An angel appeared at a university faculty meeting and told the dean that in return for his exemplary behavoir, the Lord would reward him with his choice of infinite wealth, wisdom or beauty. Withou hesitating, the dean selected infiinte wisdom. “Done,” the angel said, then disappeared. The other facutly members looked at the dean, who was surrounded by a halo of light. One colleague said, “Say something wise.”The dean sighed and said, “I should have taken the money.”
A horse walks into a bartender. The bartender asks, “Why the long face?”
A polar bear walks into a bar and says, “I’ll have a gin……………………………… and tonic.” The bartender says, “What’s with the big pause?” And the polar bear says, “I don’t know. I’ve always had them”.
A chicken and an egg are laying in bed under the sheets. The chicken takes a drag of a cigarette, turns to the egg, and says, “Well I guess this answers that question.”